Back to the beginning

I thought for a change of pace I'd turn my focus away from my current relationship, and go back in time to where it all began. My first girlfriend. Funny thing about that, the human subject of the posts is the same. Don't worry though, the time and place are well removed from the here and now.

I'd kissed a couple girls before. And hung out with a few girls during my summers at my parents cottage that I probably should have kissed. Heck, I'd even asked out her friend "K" and taken her to a movie just before asking "E" out. That was my first real date, and it basically ended with me being told "you know, I think "E" really likes you, you should ask her out." WTF?!!?? Oh well, if only every unsuccessful date ended with a referral to a more likely prospect, what a happy world this would be. But, anyway, "E" was my first girlfriend. To me that means, I asked her out. We went on a date. We still hung out after the date, with the hanging out involving kissing or hand-holding.

So yeah, I met "K" and "E" when my friend "P" was dating "K". (As an aside here....sorry for the awkwardness of the initials, but if I'm going to be relatively anonymous, I feel I should respect the anonymity of my subjects as much as possible as well). The summer of 1996, "P" and I were going down near Bower Ponds in Red Deer and rollerblading on the paths nearly every day. One day "P" brought along "K" and her pal "E". I remember that during this meeting, "P" and "K" kept swooping off by themselves leaving me to entertain "E" on my own. I don't really remember a whole lot about the details, but I do remember she had a nose ring, a small stud actually, that I kept saying would make some lovely sparks if she managed to faceplant. Also, I vividly remember her pants. These were the type of pants that stay in your mind forever. They were an incredible red/white gingham pattern, tight enough to show off her shape. I probably spent most of my time rollerblading behind her, despite being a much better skater, just to keep an eye on them. So, yeah, despite seeming to have a pretty good rapport, I didn't really talk to or think of "E" again for a few months, until after the date with "K".

Not really sure how it all worked out, but I eventually got up the courage to call "E" and ask her out. Our first date was a movie, I don't remember what it was, but somewhere in the uncomfortable darkness I got up the courage to hold her hand. I don't even remember if we kissed at the end of the night....if so, probably just a friendly peck. However, later one of her brothers told me that she "melted" when I took her hand...so that's pretty good. One thing I know for sure, this was the last time I used a movie as a first date. There's no chance to talk, you've got a big arm rest between you. You can't see well enough to read any body language. Worst first date idea EVER!

The rest of the month consisted of just hanging out, walking around the neighbourhood. Kissing beside her house. Kissing behind the school. I know I felt up her shirt...I think under her bra even, but when I tried to go below the waist she made sure to keep her legs together. I guess these details don't really matter, but I remember them for some reason.

The other thing I clearly remember was her unreliability. She would say she was going to call me on certain nights, or at certain times, and was invariably late, or even completely forgot about me. One time she left me a note in my mailbox. She'd had to skip our hanging out because she had to take a friend to Calgary for a medical emergency. This was obviously better than the times she didn't call or anything, but still hurt my feelings. For one of these, once she was supposed to hang out with me, but was nowhere to be found all night, turned out she'd headed downtown with some friends and had just forgotten to call or anything. I never really felt like she liked me that much, but I was due to move to Saskatoon at the end of the month so I just rode it out as a learning experience. You can tolerate a lot more crap in an "expiry dated" relationship than you ever would in one where you don't know when it will end.

When it was time for me to go, we had a pretty sweet goodbye, and decided that we would try to make it work while I was away. I don't think I knew at the time that my parents were going to shortly be moving away themselves, to Calgary, and I didn't really think it would work out.... but maybe I could get a kiss or two next time I came to town. A short while into my school year, I received a 4-page mess of a letter, and on the bottom of the last page, as a P.S., she dumped me. I still have the letter....maybe I should put the contents up some day....she would kill me where I stand but we'll see.

When I did come back to town, for a few days over Christmas vacation, we did hang out, and we ended up making out in the stairwell of my friend's apartment. I had just got my wisdom teeth out a couple days prior and she had a cold. I was sick for 2 weeks after that. Coincidence? One of the next times I was in town, I remember calling her and chatting for a while when she said she had to answer the beep for the other line. She popped back on the line once after a few minutes and said she'd be right back. After that I think I waited about 20 minutes while my friends made fun of me. I finally hung up and then called her back later and gave her crap. We did end up going for coffee, and then we completely lost touch until 2007.